I have become an empty vessel.
For the last eighteen months or so, I have worked at least 6 days a week, evenings included, and often late into the night. If you are a regular reader of this blog, you will have noted that my posts have decreased to a trickle, becoming both infrequent and brief.
I have been building the foundation for the fulfillment of a vision—the Rachel Greenhouse Agency—and there is no one save me who can bring this particular big picture to life.
At the same time, I have been gathering around me a team of kindred spirits with a variety of strengths in order to increase the capacity and impact of this vision. Along the way, this process has required sacrifices of me, my family, friendships and beloved pastimes, as well as—to be honest—aspects of my wellbeing and sense of balance.
Yet, the refiner’s fire has done its important work in me.
Without this path and these experiences, my essential lessons would not have been learned, my innate strengths would not have been emboldened, new skills would not have been developed, and the tapestry in this corner of the world would be less rich and colorful.
If I had not known, with a deep knowing, that this must be, I would have surely abandoned the effort in favor of playing small and resting easy some time ago.
It’s with gratitude that I pause today to acknowledge that the calling has been clear enough to lead me, my beloved husband and two sons, through the many challenging milestones along this journey.
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.” – Anaïs Nin
I am certainly not saying that the hard work is now in the rearview window…hardly.
But, I feel on the precipice of the next vista, with my new space soon to be settled and ready for use as envisioned, my team in place and trained to take on more of what I have been shouldering.
And so, I am optimistic—realistically so, I believe—about my intention that by next summer I will be back to taking actual weekends, tending my garden and preparing home-cooked meals, taking a yoga class and spending a month at a lake.
For now, I’m grateful to have set aside this weekend for a Writers’ Retreat months ago, not knowing what exceptional timing it would offer nor just how much transitional ground it would allow me to travel through and leave behind.
Reconnecting with my inner writer, my more contemplative self, affirms for me that this frenzied, creative, outward-oriented season of life and work will not always be the norm.
It is a powerful, transformational time that is an essential stepping stone on the way to sharing more of my authentic and unique vision, and establishing an even more undivided life.
Even if I am inconsistent for the next while yet, I am on my way back to this place, to myself, and to you.
p.s. If you’re interested in seeing how the agency’s design unfolds step-by-step, day-by-day, follow along via the Facebook page.